I want to go back to the Land of Nod

The English language is a wonderfully versatile thing. But sometimes it is insufficient. There is no word for "the pleasure one gets from the misfortune of others", for instance. One must turn to German for that. Nor is there an English equivalent of the French verb "chambrer", which means "to get a wine to room temperature". There isn't an English word for "that sinking feeling you get when you realise you may have left the oven on" either, but I don't think any language has that, more's the pity.


Now, I am something of a Francophile. German never really did it for me - too many strange verb endings, all that faffing around with the dative - but I've loved speaking French from my very first "je m'appelle..." So when I had to tear my eyelids apart this morning, when my entire body was screaming "Go back to sleep!", I knew that the simple English word "tired" just wouldn't cut it. Nor would "exhausted", or "bushed", or "knackered". I realised that only French could describe just how tired I am. And one French word in particular. It doesn't actally mean "tired" - the sense is closer to "knocked out" or "stunned". But seeing as that's how I'm feeling, I shall use it.


Ladies and gentlemen, this morning I am assommée.


So don't expect me to do any work, okay?
1.4.04 11:32


April Fools

Good to see the good people at iwantoneofthose.com getting into the spirit of things.


This wouldn't be much use, as hardly anyone I know actually has Bluetooth. I know a few people who'd buy this, and I would certainly invest in one of these. I must say, however, that this is just downright silly.


I wonder if anyone will actually try and order them?
1.4.04 11:38


Shame

Sweet Jesus, has it finally come to this?


I am actually seriously considering going speed dating.


Maybe I should just swallow the bleach now.
1.4.04 14:50


In a galaxy far, far away...

Okay, so it's a bit geeky (for "a bit", read "very, very, very"). But check this out. Star Wars-tastic and far, far better than the tripe George Lucas has been churning out of late. Check out Episode 13 first - Mace Windu being one badass mofo. I defy you not to go "Woo-hoo!" as he takes out a whole army single-handed.
1.4.04 16:45


EasyInternet, Victoria 19:58 - 00:12

Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh.


Pause to buy more internet credit.


Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh.


Eat banana.


Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Redial. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh.


Log off and nip over to Victoria station for a wee (because EasyInternet cafés don't have toilets. Thanks a bundle, Stelios you fat fuck).


*ring ring*


YAAGers: (on toilet) Hello?


Evie: I'VE GOT THROUGH! I'VE GOT THROUGH!


YAAGers: HURRAH! WOO! YEAH!


Glastonbury, here I come. Time to go tent shopping. Hell, yeah.
2.4.04 11:37


The sound of one hand clicking

There was something very Zen about sitting still for 4 hours in an internet cafe hitting Refresh-Refresh-Refresh-Refresh-Refresh-Refresh. I think at one point I even had an out-of-body experience.


Computer-aided meditiation. I can see it catching on.


*click*


*click*


*click*


*click*


*click*


*click*


*click*


*click*


OMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM.
2.4.04 13:10


Flutter

The Hippolytos girls livened up rehearsals on Saturday by having a Grand National sweepstake. At 3:45 we all huddled round the radio to listen to the race.  And my horse won!!


I never win anything. The last thing I won was a hand-knitted bunny rabbit in the tombola at my primary school fête. To say I was chuffed would be a fairly large understatement. I did a lap of honour round the rehearsal room.


And check out what I bought with my winnings:


Free shoes! Rock on! This "winning" malarkey is great. I must try to do it more often.
5.4.04 12:21


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